..God gave us a spirit not of fear...

Last night at missions conference skip talked about "the man that lost control". That man cared more for success and making his name great than anything else. That is what drove him, controlled him, and manipulated him. He so cared for what others had to say about who he was that he became what he thought people expected. so draining.. to keep up an image of someone you are not. draining, to keep everyone happy, draining to be success and not fail. How draining to live as if you are perfect or that you are God.What started out in his control ended up controlling him. All the while what was really happening, this self serving pride collapsed into fear. The very thing that he feared the most became his reality, that he really did not have any control in the first place. I so relate to this man. This need to be in the know and make things happen the way i think they should, "all for God's glory" of course.  So humbling when God does take all the things you do find security, comfort, and control away just to show how out of control you really are. I live in this fear, fear of messing up, fearing of not being liked, fear of being alone, fear i'm not a good enough christian, fear that i will end up settling, fear that i will not learn from my mistakes, fear that i will never look good enough, know enough, make enough. SO draining and so not the gospel. Jesus did not give his life away and die my death on the cross so that i would live in a state of fear.  

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you." Isa 43:1-2

For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” Romans 8:14-15

God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea Psalm 46:1-2

"For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 timothy 1:7

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.-1 John 4:18

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”-Deuteronomy 31:8

 "So we can confidently say,“The Lord is my helper;I will not fear; what can man do to me?” -Hebrews 13:6

I want to pray that i would believe these truths of the gospel... that He has redeemed me, He knows me by name, he is with me. God has adopted me and now i cry Abba father. He is my refuge and strength, He is very present in help,His love drives out fear,He goes before me, He will never leave or forsake me, and he has all authority on Heaven and earth. So why do i fear and have anxious thoughts. Why do i feel the need to control when He has been so faithful to me to this point. Why do i live in fear when he offers a life of freedom. Pray that i would enjoy "the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding"(phil 4:7) God help me to not rely and give my life to the things that are fading but trust the one who is life giving and eternal. Amen Amen